In his eyes

She was mad at him. She was irritated the most and screamed her lungs out to vent her anger. She was impatient to listen to his woes. She was uncontrollably violent. He tried his best to reason out, to soothe her and calm down. He was sorry for his broken promise and knew no way out to console her. Giving up, he stared at her with sorry face.. Wishing to embrace her and ask for another chance. She looked at him with fiery eyes …and then she saw it… his honey colored eyes about to get heavier with tears, which spoke million words silently conveying his innocence.. Which once were full of love, now sad & lost in her tantrums. That made her heart miss a beat… those honey shade eyes were her favorite, the most adored part of her world… She could not see it unhappy anymore.. She decided to let her anger go…only to see the smile back in his eyes.. which now reflects in her eyes too.

Ashwini.

Lift ,Please?

Am I the only one troubled by lift users? Are we not supposed to follow certain etiquettes considering that is a public property? You of course know what to do in a lift.. but do you know what not to do? Read on. No wonder if you find yourself in one of the below situation as a victim or a culprit.

·        Do not attend/make a call while you are in a lift. Of course we know you don’t catch proper signal but we don’t deserve hear your shouting either.

·        Mirrors are attractive in lift. But you do have them everywhere else.. do not embarrass others by adjusting your saree pin or cleaning your nose or worse, moist your palms and set your hair. The co-lift users are not blind.

·        Yes I may be watching a video or chatting with a friend on phone. Not even in wildest dreams it can be porn, so kindly refrain from peeping into my proximity with your squint eyes.. I may throw up on you due to your nauseating perfume.

·        Mr.Mis-user of opportunity, if you try poking your elbow to my modest parts, I do not mind questioning you loud in public. Gone are the days when could you soothe your desires by act-accidentally touching a woman. Pay and receive respect.

·        I know you are immersed intensely in a mobile conversation. But you are not moving either. You are struck on my way to enter or exit the lift..hell even to the number panel. How am I supposed to press the button? I do not have zig-zag arms to trace the path to number panel without touching you... Kindly MOVE.

·        Do not, I repeat, do not check out the girl or guy you find very attractive in the lift. Simultaneously, someone next to you might be watching you in the mirror & catch you during your I-spy act. Better to stop yourself rather than hanging your head down in shame.

·        Be a gentleman. Let the lady in the lift exit first. Do not indulge in cheap pleasure of rubbing against her in the race of exiting the lift. However, you are not going to win any race in that fraction of second.

·        Last but of most importance, please spare people in the lift from dying of suffocation. If you are a person who does not like bathing every day, or least using a deo, please use stairs. Stay dirty but stay healthy.

The journey in the lift is short, If you can’t behave well during this short journey, you are nothing more than an animal.

Issued in the spirit of “Swach Bharath Andholan”, to cleanse your attitude towards small but a prominent public place.

Ashwini.

How do I smell

My friend asked a question similar to this & I kept wondering.. How do I smell actually? I’m not a toddy cat to have smell of my own. So what is it? Like a daisy? Like a fruit or worse, garlic? Well, in that case, I would have had no “Close” friend right? So it must be something good… or atleast bearable.

Listing of all the smelly (good) products that I use might solve the question. It must be the oil of Mysore Sandal Soap or the Fructis Shampoo. It may also be Jergens Musky body lotion or Lacto calamine or the combination of both. Ohh wait, it can also be Nivea Soft touch underarms spray.. errr can I include Yardley English Rose perfume?  I am afraid, there is more! I use Downy Fabric softener which leaves my clothes smell lavender. (On an unrelated note, there’s one also available in Sunrise fragrance… who must be the great person who smelled sunrise?) I am in awe… too many aromas at once on a single body. This must theoretically leave me smelling like a bouquet & looking like a 20+ year old super model with flawless skin & shiny long hair. Oh dream, if I was anywhere close to that.

Back to square one,So what is my fragrance? Readers, you may leave right now if you don’t wish to end up smelling..err feeling smelly. No? Still curious? Ok, you asked for it. Its a combination of last food that I had and the deep pink hand wash liquid at office washroom where I frequent and sweat and pungent scalp medicine and the office air!! There, said it.. Hug, anyone? :P

And this also concludes that I have wasted too much of time in toiletries section of supermarket, deciding on the fragrance to buy.

PS : No one close to me fainted or threw up so far, I swear.

Fragrantly,

Ashwini.

Cleansing my mind

Deleting this post. I don't know if I was over reacting. Or may be the person is not actually how I presumed. But how long will I carry the bitterness in heart. 

Ashwini.

Koi mujko yun mila hai..

After running and re re running of my last love “aathe jaathe, hasthe gaathe” gaana, I have fell for a new one, as much deep as I loved the first. Is it the lyrics or the music, I can’t say… but it takes me to aww moment every time I play it. It’s “Banjaara” from the movie “Ek Villan”. There are few other pretty songs too but my heart goes for this one.

My favorite lines are:

Muskaata yeh chehra
Deta hai jo pehraa
Jaane chhupata kya dil ka samandar
Auron ko toh hardam saaya deta hai
Woh dhoop mein hai khada khud magar
Chot lagi hai usey,
Phir kyun mehsoos mujhe ho raha hai
Dil tu bata de kya hai iraada tera

I can’t seem to have enough of it. They say, when you are happy, you enjoy the music. But when you are sad, you understand the lyrics. What am I up to? It’s a riddle to me. Enough of my bak-bak, enjoy the song now.

PS : Yes, He is back J

Love,

Ashwini.

The pain of teaching Phulkas to a beginner

Once I had the torture of treating a “bachelor_hard core dosa/pongal eater” from south to lunch that was instantly planned and forced upon me. Since we met after a long time & had a lot to catch upon, we continued our chat over the kitchen table with him blabbering & me sweating out whipping a quick meal. Rice & curries were done and it was time for Phulkas which I regret even now for choosing for the menu. Being treated to hard shell, irregular shape, burnt chapatis by his wife, he was amazed with the perfectly round 360 degree fluffed soft phulkas that I was preparing. Resolved to pass on the art to his wife, the guy who never attempted to see how a kitchen looks like, settled down to taking down the notes on making them. Only if I had realized what a pain it is to explain rocket science to a layman…With the trouble of explaining, what I also hated was his desi English accent which fueled my desire of murdering him right there.

Me : It’s very simple, very much  like chapatti, just the way of baking it is different.

Him : No di, not like this.. Start from the ingredients.

Me : Okay, it’s just wheat flour, oil, salt & water.

Him : What is the proportion?

Me : Your wife would know.. It’s very basic

Him : No di.. I need every detail.

Me : For a cup of flour approx., you will need 2-3 spoon of oil, a pinch of salt & may be quarter cup of water.

Him : Normal wheat flour-aa? And which spoon, table-aa tea-aa? No approx water, tell me exact quantity in ml.

Me : This is common sense..leave it to her. So once you knead the dough, leave it to settle for at least 20 mins.

Him : How much to knead? And why keep aside for 20 mins? Fermenting-va?

Me : No.. ( I feel better to agree with his assumption) YES !

Him : Nextu?

Me : Roll it evenly and transfer to the preheated tawa. Even before the chapatti catches baked dots, turn it over, let the second side bake completely after which place the first baked side directly over flames & watch it fluff..

Him : Ayyoo wait-aa wait.. which side on flame?

Me : The first side, which you had put on tawa immediately after rolling

Him : The one that was fully cooked-aa?

Me : No, which was partially cooked…which we turned over even before its first brown spot

Him : What about the second side di?

Me : Second side is completely cooked on tawa

Him : Then why to put it on flame again?

Me : No, we put the other side on flame.

Him : Which side is this? Third-aa?

Me : WHAT? Where did the third side come from?

Him : You are confusing.. the one that was half baked will go on fire-aa?

Me : YES ! You got it. (Finally, PHEW)

Him : Then which side is left to bake on tawa?

Me : I give up… Please bring home your wife once for lunch, I better teach her.

Him : Why are you annoyed di.. pleaZe tell which side will go on tawa

Me : If you don’t stop, I won’t mind throwing you on tawa.

Him : Which side di?

Me : GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR !

Tips folks.. Keep you guest out of your kitchen, if you don’t wish to get cooked while teaching them the recipe.

Much annoyed,

Ashwini

Bisibelebath that went Cold :(

“I’m hungry. Is there anything in to eat? Let me check the drawers. Oh but they are snacks...and I’m real hungry...as in I could hear grrrrrrr grumbles from stomach. I need solid food. Like what? Like onion utappam,idlis or poori kurma. But you need to order them from restaurant …arrgh..I can’t wait until they deliver. So what shall I do?  Chal beta,aaj cooking karenge.. But what to cook? Lemon  rice? Pongal? Hmmm…craving is for spicy dish.. Ha, my bisibelebath ! But do I have vegetables?  Check. Dal? Check. Coconut & spices? Check. Whts stopping you t hen…get set po.. cook dal and rice,chop veggies fry and grind spices, mix everything , adjust seasoning  and tadaa..its ready. Hot,spicy & tangy !  Aah the bliss ! A bowl full of sexy bisibelebath,settle on the couch and set favourite movie on TV…lemme indulge in the heaven…

“Tringgg tringgg, tringgg tringggggggggg”

“Hello,how are you,is Raghav back, whts for dinner, blah blah blah, some more blah blah blah, even more blah blah blah”

“Sorry dear…for keeping you wait…come here now.. let me savour your  steamy love”

“Tringggg tringgg….. (Panic) Tringg Tringggggggggggg”

“Hello, just checking on you, had dinner? What u made? There is some sale blah blah and shopping & vacation & vacation homework blah blah blah blah (I’m deaf now) Ok,eat and sleep well,bye”

“Ayyo… my poor bisibelebath..have you  lost your patience…err  your  charm? Sorry baby, ppl bothering me too much, keeping me away from you.. come on you..lets not delay anymore…

“Tringg tringggg……

“Somebody please wreck the neck of this damn phone !! I hate you people; coming in between me and my bisibelebath… he is already cold and lost his charm… Oh please people,stop calling me.. I am fine.. I can do for a while without Raghav.. I am hungry.. I need to eat ..please…”

Ashwini.

Jo tera hai woh mera hai?

Indian Couple

Her : I wish I had a bank account of my own

Him : What is wrong in sharing my account?

Her : Nothing, but it feels good to have an identity of own.

Him : Come on, Jo mera hai woh tera hai, don’t you believe?

Rest of the world

Girl 1 : Do you have a car?

Girl 2 : No.

Girl 1 : Oh,I was looking for a car cleaner.I thought I could borrow yours.

Girl 2 : I can help, I know a guy who cleans my husband’s car !

Girl 1 : But you said you don’t have a car ?

Girl 2 : Yes, I don’t. He does!!

Ashwini.

Indefinite

Sleepless nights

Patience to hear "that" knock on the door

Hours spent picking swamped tissues

Candle lit to make feel his presence

A wait, to see him back

Our future

How else can I define indefinite?

Ashwini.

Away, not far

It was just yesterday that I was sulking how far is Raghav from me and today I realized that he is only away, not far. This is the nth time I am wondering what magic distance does to couples. Matters that go un noticed and un said when we were together run like a movie clip in front of my eyes now, all day all along. Some tidbits of those magical moments are worth mentioning and worth treasuring. Sorry if the post ahead sounds too cheesy, but that is how it is.

I was watching a movie on TV while messaging Raghav on WhatsApp. It was half past ten in India and I least expected a reply from the other side, knowing he would be asleep at this time. To my delight, he replied and amidst the conversation,he says :

Him:  You are lying on the couch with two pillows under your head... right?

Me:  Korreckt !

Him: Dishes to be washed are piled up in the sink.

Me: Howdu (Yes)

Him: You have thrown your shawl on the table and shoes at the door.

Me: Wait a min.. you are blindly guessing these…right?

Him: Your lunch box is still in your bag & ad pamphlets are not picked from the door.

Me:  Any chance you installed a CCTV without my knowledge?

Him: (ignoring my clueless questions) And it is commercials break on TV now.

Me: Devreeee! I don’t believe this! What the hell is going on? How did you get all of them right? Tell me before my brain explodes.

Him: I know you darling… I don’t need to see you to know what you are up to.

Me: But this close? When did you learn all these? Your attention was always grabbed by news or shares channel while I was around?

Him: I have four eyes for a reason ( A wink smiley)

Me:  And how did you come up with that ad break on TV? Now that can’t be your guess.

Him: (Patting his own back) Ad break is the only time you ever answer me!

Me: (Shy,amused,embarrassed,speechless) ….

Him: And your silence says the movie has resumed… carry on

Me: …..

Hmmm... This is what you end up with after seven years of being with each other. Touch wood, I am blessed, to have someone who knows me more than I know myself. And this is why I said that he is just away, not far…and never can be J

Ashwini.

Chronicles of a lonely soul

    

 In a much unexpected circumstance, I’m forced to put up alone, for undetermined number of days. As a result of visa formalities, Raghav is staying in his home town for some time and I’m in Abu Dhabi. When I faced this fact, I dreaded to accept. But along the time, it has turned out to be positive.  It helped me discover my strength, patience and sense of responsibility, which otherwise I thought I lacked. 

1.  For the first time in life, I traveled alone from Airport to home, at an hour past mid night. Not every day a woman gets a chance to take a taxi alone during midnight & I did not want to miss it. Though it was out of choice, there was an unknown sense of fear deep inside, cursing me each second for trying to risk out this adventure. Eventually, it turned out to be the best ride of my life, being driven in a Benz like a queen. The pleasure was so much that I felt the journey should have been longer. The boost of confidence I acquired that night will go along a long way in the course of my life.
2.  Staying alone was never on my wish list. But when life serves you lemon, you got to do something with it. Double checking the door before sleeping, grocery shopping, attending the social events, waking up before the alarm rings, living on the schedule,  paying the bills and many more little things brought a sense of responsibility within me.  And one will not believe if I say I have not eaten anything other than home food from past fifteen days. It’s a miracle, I know, but cooking on weekends too is my routine now.
3.  A friend in need is the friend indeed. And now I know my friends more than I had ever known. So much of concern and help flowing in amazes me and makes me wonder if I deserve that. Lucky indeed also to have identified fake people who boast their eternal to the death friendship but failed in action. Not that I expect anyone to attend me when called, but feels good to know true friends.
4.  A very special bond is built among group of us girls, who are colleagues otherwise. I don’t know how this is related to my situation, but co incidentally happening at the same time.  I had fewer loved being with girls before but now they feel like family. We share gossips, lunch, fights, secrets like teens and the amount of laugh it results is to the level of getting me stomach aches. 
5.  Lots of me time is letting me get more organized. It is helping me take more care of myself.  Going to sleep with a book in hand is now my favourite time of the day.  All the chores which bored me to death before is now done with no complaints. I am loving my own company.
6.  Raghav is missed of course. No other character can replace his existence and it is conveyed to him every day. Phone calls are frequent and Whats app rings nonstop. Distance has brought us closer and I am looking forward to be embraced soon.  Distance has taught me the meaning of togetherness and joy of sharing lives.

Wish me people.. I don’t know if this is happening for good. Somewhere within, a fear tickles for a moment … fear of being lonely for a longer period.  But otherwise, life is in my stride.

Ashwini.

2014 & a much needed bullet

As seen in history, welcoming my new year has always been with a bang. It was with a Humpty dumpy fall last year while this time it was with a threatening SMS, from my bank,at 1.30AM on 1^st Jan ,informing about the loan installment which has been debited from my account. I wish they had chosen a better time. While the whole world exchanged greetings, my bank exchanged fear files with me.. but what is a life that tunes to your beat.

Last year has been pretty fair to me. Apart from crossing the milestone of 30years of my existence, things were quite cheerful. I have made few wonderful friends and happily deleted the bothering ones from my head. A housewarming, a controversy, an historical interview, time spent with sister around AUH, few road trips, some Enlightened moments (another post dedicated to this will follow), a heartbreak and many more mushy moments marks a wonderful year I had. Oh I forgot to say, Rags had been and still continues to be as supportive & irritative as he ever was ! ( Not my fault, my each post is incomplete without his mentioning). My heart still beats in joy when I hear him entering the home and my blood still boils when I see him littering the bathroom. He had been dare full enough to take a major life changing decision while being equally lazy to change the dead battery of my poor laptop. ( My laptop works on continuous power supply & I had to re write this post when accidentally the chord plugged out..ohh wait, let me save this content first !) With this confused state of life, I heartily welcome you, 2014, if you promise me to be the best one I ever had !

Many a times in between,I logged in to write down the things happening at my end. But did not. Most of them were sad ones and purpose of writing this blog is to record only the best/funny things worth remembering even years later. So shedding all the unworthy ones, here is a master piece, which though not with pride, but as humor I am posting :

There is a typical character in my project. The most dumb headed,absent minded creature I have ever seen. Below is the convo between her & another girl on the eve of Republic Day.

The dumb head (DH) : Arey, paper me aaya hai, aaj India ka Republic Day hai

Other Girl (OG) : Yeah, din't you know?

DH : No yaar, I know..but I dont remember. There is another flag hoist day no??

OG : WHAT?

DH : Arey that Oct 14^th or something, they hoist flag again na?

OG :(Unable to believe what she heard) Did you mean 15^th Aug?

DH : Yeah I think so, another Republic Day

OG : (Almost had an heart attack by now) My GOD, that is Independence Day !!

DH : Haan re, wohi...mein confuse hojathi hoon between these two days.

OG : My dear, there are only two important day for Indians, how can you forget or get                      confused with them?

DH : (Sounding like an innocent kid) I remember,hum white dress me school jaathe the aur                Jana Gana Mana gaathe the.. bus muje days yaad nahi rehta

OG : (Almost speechless with her argument) Shame on you,You don't deserve to be an Indian.

DH : (Being the dumb head she is) Arey mein kya karu muje confuse hua tho?

By now, both OG & Me had reached the point of ultimate numbness ,at loss words to convey her the importance of our National days. Patriotism should come from heart, not by teaching. No one taught us to love our mom. As they say, bandar kya jaane adrak ka swaad, it is waste of time to enlighten such fools.But it does hurt to see such careless people. Wish Nathuram Godse had spared a bullet..

Ashwini.