Chronicles of a lonely soul

    

 In a much unexpected circumstance, I’m forced to put up alone, for undetermined number of days. As a result of visa formalities, Raghav is staying in his home town for some time and I’m in Abu Dhabi. When I faced this fact, I dreaded to accept. But along the time, it has turned out to be positive.  It helped me discover my strength, patience and sense of responsibility, which otherwise I thought I lacked. 

1.  For the first time in life, I traveled alone from Airport to home, at an hour past mid night. Not every day a woman gets a chance to take a taxi alone during midnight & I did not want to miss it. Though it was out of choice, there was an unknown sense of fear deep inside, cursing me each second for trying to risk out this adventure. Eventually, it turned out to be the best ride of my life, being driven in a Benz like a queen. The pleasure was so much that I felt the journey should have been longer. The boost of confidence I acquired that night will go along a long way in the course of my life.
2.  Staying alone was never on my wish list. But when life serves you lemon, you got to do something with it. Double checking the door before sleeping, grocery shopping, attending the social events, waking up before the alarm rings, living on the schedule,  paying the bills and many more little things brought a sense of responsibility within me.  And one will not believe if I say I have not eaten anything other than home food from past fifteen days. It’s a miracle, I know, but cooking on weekends too is my routine now.
3.  A friend in need is the friend indeed. And now I know my friends more than I had ever known. So much of concern and help flowing in amazes me and makes me wonder if I deserve that. Lucky indeed also to have identified fake people who boast their eternal to the death friendship but failed in action. Not that I expect anyone to attend me when called, but feels good to know true friends.
4.  A very special bond is built among group of us girls, who are colleagues otherwise. I don’t know how this is related to my situation, but co incidentally happening at the same time.  I had fewer loved being with girls before but now they feel like family. We share gossips, lunch, fights, secrets like teens and the amount of laugh it results is to the level of getting me stomach aches. 
5.  Lots of me time is letting me get more organized. It is helping me take more care of myself.  Going to sleep with a book in hand is now my favourite time of the day.  All the chores which bored me to death before is now done with no complaints. I am loving my own company.
6.  Raghav is missed of course. No other character can replace his existence and it is conveyed to him every day. Phone calls are frequent and Whats app rings nonstop. Distance has brought us closer and I am looking forward to be embraced soon.  Distance has taught me the meaning of togetherness and joy of sharing lives.

Wish me people.. I don’t know if this is happening for good. Somewhere within, a fear tickles for a moment … fear of being lonely for a longer period.  But otherwise, life is in my stride.

Ashwini.